Datchet Narrowly Fall to Burnham but Disappoint Circling Birds of Prey

Captain Dicky had to make changes for this trip to the very impressive Burnham ground with 4 of his top 7 away, including self-appointed “best batsman” Thomas Jones.   PC Brown got a late call-away, believed to be Mrs Smith’s cat being stuck up that tree again, and after trying every other person within a 20 mile radius Dicky turned to the 1192-wicketed Nick Kenny to complete the XI.  Waters, who is always stated to be “available next week” actually was this time, and made a welcome return to be reunited with Dusty Harris, Dicky and Bongi from their all-conquering early 90s colts vintage.  With George, Kenners, JD & Theinus it was a line-up full of on one hand experience, but on the other Deep Heat, supports and tight hamstrings.

A rain delay allowed us to watch the British Lions squeak home, but also allowed the younger element (a particularly green looking Finn, Richards and the rich man’s Ryan Stamp, Rhys Williams) to share their tales of bravado and derring-do from the previous night.  For the remainder, familiar tales of players’ sisters and famous urinations were recounted to the admiring younger contingent.   Kenners posed a quiz question as to which are the only 2 tube stations containing all 5 vowels, and after clarification for Rhys of what constituted a vowel, Georgey identified South Ealing.   That prompted Rhys to emit “the other must be North Ealing then” before realising his schoolboy error.  Kenners observed to a local that it looked like an afternoon of showers, to which the local suggested that it would be on and off showers, these being the kind of showers Kenners had in mind.

After this merriment, it was time for some cricket, with Theinus and Georgey getting us off to a very strong start, Theinus hitting some sweet fours and MG not far behind.  For those of you who havent been there, Burnham is a bird watcher’s dream with birds of prey swooping at regular intervals.  Dusty showed impressive bird knowledge and observed the appearance of red kites, to which (honestly) Bongi came straight back with “dont be silly, you ginger t*sser, they are real birds not kites”.  After a clarification from Harris full of ornithological correctness, Bongi was full of remittance and perhaps grudging admiration for Dusty’s hidden talent.

Despite a short rain break, during which Rhys won a whopping £360 on a race at Ascot, and predictions of biblical floods from Bongi in particular recalling Neal Patmore at his most pessimistic, Datchet continued to bat well with 25 from Theinus, and a controlled but positive Georgey with great support from Rhys taking us to 100-1.

At this stage, things went wrong.  Burnham had a couple of useful spinners who started to do damage. Rhys was adamant he did not hit his, although it was pointed out to him that this did not prevent him being stumped, and with MG departing just after reaching an excellent 50 and Waters and Dusty only showing the briefest glimpses of their prime, Datchet were soon 130-5.  It was left to some huge blows from Bongi (toying with the man at long off) and Finn and minor contributions from the tail to take us to 186ao off the last ball of our revised 49 overs.

We opened with the all-conquering JD and Dicky with the old ball, but for once they were not quite on song with the impressive Burnham opener starting off well.  It took a fiery Lambert to get us going via an excellent Waters catch.  Lambert then outclassed the number 3 who played and missed off him at least 20 times, but with no luck for our man.  Indeed at 90-1, only rain looked to likely to save us from comprehensive defeat.

However JD, after getting over the disappointment of not being able to take all 10, bowled a very good second spell. Kenners, despite not finding his rhythm, taking his tally from 1192 to 1194 through 2 fine Richards’ catches, Burnham were soon 120-5 and game on.  The opener remained a problem with Dicky setting the field back but the opener calmly taking a single every ball.

At 150-5 and with Datchet now resembling an army coming back from war with Lambert (side), Dicky (Knee, hamstring, etc), Finn (elbow), Rhys (buttock) among the casualties, things did not look good.  The red kites smelt rotting flesh and circled ever lower.   Further wickets for JD and 2 in a over from Dicky including the opener pulled us right back in it.     Unfortunately a catch just evaded Kenners in the penultimate over and a couple of brave blows took Burnham to victory.

So Datchet took 12 points, several knocks, and increased bird and vowel knowledge from this game.   Joking aside, it was a well-contested, good-spirited game that could have gone either way and given we had 4 missing, confirms that we can compete at the top of this division.  Thanks to all for their good company and hope to see them again sometime.


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Categories: Match Report


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One Comment on “Datchet Narrowly Fall to Burnham but Disappoint Circling Birds of Prey”

  1. Will Richards
    June 24, 2013 at 9:33 pm #

    Excellent report Kenners!

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